Wings: The Difference Between Flapping and Fapping

#9: Know when to intervene
Article by Ian Kar, Franklin and Marshall College — One of the easiest place to find girls, by far, is college.

You can literally meet them anywhere, the mailroom, the gym, the bookstore, the dining hall, and can talk to them because you both have something in common, you go to the same school.

However, the best place to meet someone at college is definitely the basement of a frat on a Thursday, Friday, or Saturday night. The weekends are what college students live for, they are an integral part of the college experience, and some schools are famous for their social life.

But even when the booze is flowing and “Levels” or “Call Me Maybe” is blasting through the dance floor, it can be difficult for guys to meet, talk to, and eventually, leave with a sorostitute. These guys need the perfect wingman. Outlined below are the some attributes that will boost you to becoming the perfect wingman:

1) Exaggerate everything.

A great wingman can make anyone look like they are the most important person on their campus, except when Wiz Khalifa came for a concert.

There is literally nothing he can’t do, including give a girl a tour of the “Brother’s Only” room. The more you talk your friend up, the more impressed this girl will be with him, which will make her more likely to make some questionable decisions later on in the night.

The only problem you have to be aware of is to not overdue it and be realistic. There’s a big difference between making someone look like the second coming of Jesus, when you’re trying to make him resemble Van Wilder.

2) Boost his Confidence

This is a key. Your main job as a wingman is to support your friend no matter, like any loyal friend should. The key to picking up girls at a party is to be confident, girls notice that and will react positively to it. So you need to make sure your bro is on top of his A game and feels like he can take on the world. Boosting your friends confidence is important because a lot of guys need wingmen at their most vulnerable times, like right after they get dumped or when their in a new setting (i.e. freshmen). Some liquid courage wouldn’t hurt (see below).

3) Know Something about Everyone

This is a characteristic solely for guys in college. I find that the more people you know, the easier it is to set your friends up with those people. Therefore, a great wingman should be able to be able to recite facts about a girl from the top of his head, like if she’s completely shameless, if she dated a mutual friend, or if she’s your ex girlfriend’s little. Theres a lot less pressure when you introduce a friend to a girl. So, the more people you know, the more prospects your friend has.

4) Bite the bullet

When you’re a wingman, don’t expect to get the babe. While most guys have wingmen that are trying to get the to hook up with someone, girls have “wing-women” that are usually trying to prevent their friends hook up with guys. It’s your job to feign interest long enough so your boy can close the deal, if the friend that you’re supposed to be distracting drags her away, it’s your fault. I find that people who are in a relationship are usually better wingmen when it comes to this, because they know that they won’t be cheating on their girlfriends, so your wingman and her friend can chat it up, while you tear it up on the dance floor.

5) Know How to drink

Alcohol is the best lubricant for almost any guy. It makes them more confident, smooth, and gives them the charisma to say things they would never say sober. But make sure you don’t overdo it; if you and/or your friend black out, your chances of hooking up with someone go down exponentially, until the only way you’re wing-manning your boy is getting him water when he’s throwing up outside.

6) Be Able to Read Signals

Girls give very telling signs to indicate whether or not they are into a guy, or they need their girlfriends to save them from this creep that keeps talking to them all night. All you have to do is be able to interpret them. As a wingman, its your job to friend if he should try to pursue this girl or move on to the next one.

7) Knowing When to Move On

Sometimes, for whatever reason, a girl is just plain and simple not interested in someone. Mind-boggling, but it happens. Being a wingman means that you sometimes have to tell your friend the harsh truth, that the girl they think is Kate Upton’s younger sister is just not into him. It’s your job to keep your friend from not having tunnel vision and focusing on one girl, especially if the girl isn’t interested.

8) Be Outgoing

Being a wingman means that you’re going to have to put yourself in some potentially awkward situations. Sacrificing yourself by introducing you and your friend to a group of unknown girls is high on that list, because you never know which way it could go. They can be charmed just as easily as they can laugh in your face. But this night isn’t about you, it’s about your friend finding some chicks to get him out of his dry spell. Being outgoing is not only helps your friend but makes you look confident, one of the few things that impresses every girl.

9) Know When to Intervene

Sometimes, your friend meets a girl on his own. It happens. She’s laughing and smiling and getting very close to him. This is a good thing, meaning your boy doesn’t need a wingman, so don’t interfere! A harsh reality of being a wingman is that sometimes you’re not needed. What you need to remember is that you are there to help your friend.

10) Never Steal the Girl

It’s shocking how often this happens but all of a sudden the night has taken a turn for the weird. Its like all the girls can smell the desperation on your friend and the girl he’s been chatting with the entire night has been checking you out from across the room. If this is happening, stop immediately and don’t do whatever is crossing your mind. As I said before, you shouldn’t go into a night when you’re wingmanning someone expecting to hook up with you. Its horribly demoralizing for a girl you’ve been talk to all night to be stolen away, much less by a friend. There are dozens of fish in the sea, you don’t have to take the one that your bro think he has a chance with.

Wing-manning your boys is not an easy thing to do and can become all night task. But hopefully these tips will help you the next time you play Goose to your Maverick and create a night for the record books.

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